It's been a quiet couple of months, pushing copies of the book onto people who show an interest and getting extremely good reviews from them.

A milestone a couple of days ago when the local bookshop Queens Park Books put three copies on their shelves.

And there it is! Wow!

Of course, we have yet to see whether it catches anyone's eye...

Yellow Pages

Had a JR Hartley moment today when C wanted to give someone a copy of The Book of Starters that I did the photography for in 1996.

Fortunately, I didn't have to traipse around the second-hand bookshops. C found it on eBay for £2.50 in about 10 seconds...

Back in the day #1

On my first day driving the 31 bus back in 1977, I drove past some roadworks at the junction of Earls Court Road and Old Brompton Road.

Immediately afterwards, I heard the bell being rung repeatedly. It took a few moments to register and remember that this was the emergency stop signal from the conductor. I pulled up in Redcliffe Gardens, stopped the engine and went back to see what the problem was.

My conductor was standing on the platform calmly smoking a fag, so I asked him what the problem was. He turned his head upwards and nodded. I followed his gaze and saw that the upper deck had a large hole ripped in it.

I was amazed. Apparently, as we had passed the roadworks, a mechanical digger had swung into the bus, gouging away several feet of the upper deck.

I asked if anyone was hurt, whether there had been anyone up there.
The conductor said, "Just one bloke, black fella, he got off the bus, white as a sheet!"

Post free giveaway weekend

You could say that there was a vast increase in downloads - 33 over the weekend as opposed to 23 (paid) since August 26.

I suppose it has taught me a little about how to use Witter. However, 33 seems a small number considering how much info I put out there. I will be very interested to see if any reviews come of it. Everything I read now says free giveaways are BAD as people don't read what they have got for free and then if they do, leave shitty reviews.

Unless anything truly appalling happens between now and then, I shall give it another try mid-December and then put the book on any/all other e-book outlets.

Twitter

Oh Jeez. I have just been given a tutorial on using Twitter. How does anyone have the time..??

Giving it away

This weekend - November 15/16 I am giving away the Kindle version of George and the Dragon

I have been following a marketing game plan from DigitalBooksToday. It has left me totally baffled about forums, twitter etc I hope I have put the right bits in the right place. You have to know by now that I am not a social-media animal!

It will certainly be interesting to see whether a give-away results in any downloads at all, there seem to be thousands of them on offer and I cannot really see how my marketing might stand out...

Watch this space!

Streets of London 2014 - an observation of current rules and behaviours

Coitus Interrupts or the Puller-Outer

Wants to pull out of a side road into the main road, glances briefly to the right, sees traffic and pulls out anyway.

The Non-Indicator

Does not use indicators perhaps because they require too much physical effort (that finger stretch can be really difficult) or because indicating intentions shows weakness, especially if turning right.

The Knee Jerk

Reacts immediately to the perceived insult of a toot by tooting back, longer, and usually louder.

The Turner Prize

In the wake of universal power-assisted steering, almost everyone who finds themselves facing the wrong way does a three-point turn. In a side road, in a main road, in front of other traffic, in front of schools, not yet on dual-cariageways but that will come soon enough.

Not So Merry-go-Round

It is obviously impossible to apply the same rules of roundabout priority to a mini-roundabout, that must be too complicated.

Swing Wide, Sweet Chariot

Is it really necessary to swing to the right-hand side of the road in order to turn left? In a mini? Didn’t need to when I was driving a Routemaster so even the Chelsea tractors have no excuse.

Right of Centre Status

It is obviously difficult to drive a large car on city streets, who knows where the left hand wing mirror is? Much safer to drive in the middle of the road, even if there are cars coming the other way - they can get out of the way.

The Non-Starter

Leaves a super-safe gap to the car in front so that three cars behind catch the red and have to sit through another cycle of the lights.

FU the Texterestrial

Uses the distraction of the text message just arrived to qualify instantly in most of the above categories (especially as non-starters).

The No-Thank-you

Lifting a hand from the wheel to acknowledge someone giving way is far too much trouble and shows weakness.

The Red Exception

If some extraordinary event such as roadworks, slow-moving traffic, a pedestrian or another car turning right denies you your perceived rightful passage through traffic lights then it is perfectly ok to go through a red light.

But let’s not fall into the four-wheels-bad->two-wheels/legs-good trap. So lest we forget:

The Handicap System

By which everyone on two wheels whether Grand P(r)izza scooter or granny with a shopping basket on a sit-up-and-beg has an in alienable right to be at the front of any queue.

Human Rights Lawyer

The pedestrian who knows the law about priorities on crossings and junctions so is happy to enforce that right by stepping in front of moving traffic, no matter how close, without pausing, or looking anywhere but straight ahead.

And the Monsoon Season (a rain shower) that instantaneously makes all of the above behaviours compulsory for everyone on the streets of London.

When I was learning to drive, my dad said that the definition of good driving ‘is to never force anyone else to brake’. Nowadays constantly testing other road users’ brakes is much more important. I will be interested to see how Google/Mercedes/Audi/Volvo self-driving cars deal with these behaviours, or will they be programmed to behave the same way to avoid being readily identified as robots (and thus, soft targets)?